Afraid to Let You Go
by anime16
Summary: Tsukino Watanabe was a girl who had terminal illness. With only a few years to live, she wanted to live life to the fullest. She stumbled on the third music room and her life would never be the same again. Love and Death were never a good combination.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN.**** JUST THIS STORY ^^**

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

**Chapter 1: Sorrowful Girl.**

I won't live past eighteen years old. I smiled ruefully. How pathetic. I can't even get married and that was my dream since childhood, to have a loving husband by my side and joyful kids in my life. But, I guess that won't happen. Well, I'm going to die after turning eighteen anyway. My terminal illness shattered all my dreams, ambitions and all my hopes in life. I'm so pitiable...so useless. Big teardrops suddenly cascaded down my cheeks. What? Why am I crying? I should accept my fate and carry on my life. As I wiped away my tears with my hands, I felt so miserable. Why? Why did this illness choose me? I am just a girl who wanted to have a life with no worries and pain. And I would like to experience falling in love. But this illness will just brought pain to me and the ones I love. And I really don't want them to experience that. More tears fell on my cheeks. I could remember vividly the conversation between my parents and the physician. They wanted to hide my illness from me but I overheard them.

"_She couldn't live past eighteen years old...Surgery could prolonged her life but it would be too risky..."_

Those were the words that cut deep into my heart. The woes of my parents and the agonizing face of my physician were the painful moments that will forever be carve in my mind and the unbearable truth that I was going to die. And here I was, crying to myself in the stone bench of the fountain, where no one can hear nor see me. Or so I thought.

"What are you doing here, beautiful lady?" A playful voice asked. I looked up and saw a boy who had light brown hair and enticing golden orbs, in which I got entranced for a moment. His voice brought me back to the reality.

"Are you crying?" his voice full of concern. I shook my head and replied, "Dust just get on my eyes."

"Are you sure?" he questioned me. I nodded and stood up, dusting my uniform.

"I better get going. And thank you for your concern," I muttered and walked away.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

"Tsukino-chan!" Akemi Yoshida, my only best friend in the whole wide world shouted at me. She smiled brightly and took my hand. Her eyes were sparkling and I gulped, I could sense the danger already. That's my instinct whenever she felt excited. She would drag me into another mess again.

"Let's go to the third music room," she hollered, feeling thrilled. Well, the third music room was like a paradise to ladies like us. There, resides a group of six males who were filthy rich, charming and powerful. But I didn't get a chance to go there when I entered this exclusive school called Ouran. I was always absent. You know, it was because of my illness. So it was my first time. And it was Akemi's first time too. She swore to me that we would go there together but because I am frequent absent, this is our first chance to go.

"Oh, I can't wait to see the twins!" She screamed. "I always admired them. They looked so cool."

"Then I guess we will request for them," I smiled at her and she was really ecstatic. We exited our classroom and trudged the stairs towards the third music room. We stopped at an elegant, big door which says third music room. I grabbed the knob and opened it. Roses flew everywhere and six males grinned at us and said, "Welcome!"

"So my ladies," a blonde boy flipped his hair. "Which type do you want?"

Akemi blushed and almost fainted on the spot. She held her reddened cheeks, closed her eyes and exclaimed, "We like the Hitachiin twins please!"

The blonde boy pouted and said, "Very well. Hikaru and Kaoru please entertain our two guests here!"

"Roger," the identical twins shouted harmoniously. We were lead to an empty table and they helped us sit down. This is my first time looking at them closely and I was shocked. Light brown hair and golden orbs, one of them approached me a while ago in the fountain. I opened my mouth to speak but what would I say. He probably forgot it already and would think of me as a deranged fan girl who wanted his attention so much. I sighed and kept my mouth shut. Leave all the talking to my best friend.

"My name is Akemi Yoshida! I'm a first year student. I'm in class 1-B!" she shouted and pointed at me, "This is my best friend. Her name is Tsukino Watanabe! We are in the same class."

The twins smiled, "Nice to meet you Akemi-chan, Tsukino-chan!"

"And you know, we want to play a game with the both of you!" one of the twins said. Akemi nodded her head vigorously and said, "Yes, we want to play. What game is it?"

"Which one is Hikaru game?" the twins hollered at the same time. Akemi looked troubled and pouted cutely. She looked between the twins.

"The right side was Hikaru and the left side was Kaoru!" Akemi said. The twins smirked.

"Bu-Buu! You're wrong!" The twins made an "X" with their arms and shook their heads.

"No, you're not wrong Akemi-chan," A brown haired guy with kind features smiled at us. And Akemi almost fainted again. The twins pouted and stared at the brown haired guy, "Not fair Haruhi-chan! Don't tell them!"

The guy called Haruhi grinned at them and looked away to attend to his own clients. The twins were still moping.

"It's alright," I gave them a reassuring smile.

"No, it's not alright!" they shouted. I sighed and sipped a tea.

"They looked so cute," Akemi blushed. The guy on the right side smirked. I think he was the one called Hikaru.

"But Kaoru was cuter! He got nightmare last night and clung to me like a kid!" Hikaru smiled. Kaoru pouted, "Hikaru that was mean!"

Hikaru's eyes softened and held his twin chin, "But I can't help it. You were so cute."

Akemi wiggled and turned redder, "This must be the brotherly love~!"

I forced a smile. This act was getting ridiculous but I can't help to look at my best friend's face. She was very happy. And suddenly, my heart clenched. My hands shot up and hold my chest. It was so painful. Sweat trickled down my neck. One of the twins noticed me. I think the guy in the left called Kaoru.

"Are you alright? You looked really pale," he asked. The same concerned face I saw a while ago in the fountain.

"I'm alright," the pain got worst and I clenched my fist. I stood up and said, "I-I need to go to the restroom!"

I ran out of the third music room and went to the nearest restroom. I clasped my necklace. The pendant was a little bottle, containing pills for my illness. I swallowed one pill and drank water. The pain subsided and I slumped down, panting. Tears were falling down my cheeks. I was afraid. I thought I would die. I stood up, washed my face and wiped it with my handkerchief. Then I exited the bathroom.

"You cried again. You were always crying," a deep voice uttered. I turned around to my right side and saw one of the twins, leaning on the wall.

"I'm not crying," I was walking away when he grabbed my arm and made me face him.

"Your eyes were lonely and sad," he commented. I pulled my arm away from him and shouted, "You don't know me so please keep your comments to yourself, Hitachiin-san."

"My name is Kaoru," he mumbled. I looked at him and hollered, "How should I know that you're not joking? You might be Hikaru-kun."

"I'm serious. I am really Kaoru," he uttered.

"Fine," I said and walked away, giving a dismissive wave, "Nice to meet you, Kaoru-kun."

I sighed. I would never go back to the third music room again if it means I have to see him again. But, I left Akemi there. Oh no! What should I do?

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

anime16: thanks for reading the story. Please review. I need to know if you want me to continue. This is my first story under this category.


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN. JUST THIS STORY ^^**

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

**Chapter 2: Daze.  
**

As much as I want to go home already, I really can't leave Akemi there. I sighed when I re-entered the third music room. My eyes searched for my best friend. I found her shouting and giggling with the other female guests as the twins touched each other and do the brotherly love. I can't help but look at the twins, wandering if Kaoru-kun was the one who really talked to me or they were just playing pranks on me. I sighed again, I shouldn't keep thinking about those things. I walked to my best friend and told her that it was time to go. I turned her to me and it was obvious that she was lovesick.

"It was paradise. I saw heaven Tsukino-chan!" Akemi told to me. I shook her and said, "Snap out of it!" I helped her stand up and I casted one last look at the twins. I blushed when I saw one of them already staring at me. The same enticing golden orbs, it was so deep and caring. I looked away. I shouldn't have these feelings. I went to the door and found a boy with black hair and eye glasses, blocking my way.

"You need to pay first before leaving," he said.

"We need to pay?" I asked him. He rolled his eyes and uttered, "Do you expect a service and entertainment free of charge these days?"

"I'm sorry. I thought that we don't need to pay for clubs," I replied. "Can I use a credit card?"

"Any form of payment is welcome," he stated. I took out my credit card and gave it to him. I told Akemi to wait outside and she exited the room in a daze. The eyeglasses boy went to his desk and swiped my card to his machine. Then he wrote our names to his log book but still he didn't give back my credit card.

"Can I get my card now?" I asked him. He shook his head and fixed his eyeglasses.

"I'm still getting information about you. And I need you to answer my questions if I have any," he said. I frowned at him.

"Why do you need to get my information?" I questioned him.

"We need to know the back ground of our customers so we could entertain them better," he answered. He opened his laptop and typed something.

"Who are you by the way? You still don't know if I will come back here again," I said to him. He smirked, "My name is Kyoya Ootori. I'm the vice president of this club and I'm a second year student."

"So you're my senpai then," I told him and he nodded. He went back to his laptop.

"Your name is Tsukino Watanabe, only child of the president of Watanabe Banks and Corporation. Please say hi to your father for me. And your mother is a successful hair stylist, owning some of the biggest salons in Japan. Please say that I will be please if I could meet such a wonderful person," he said, smiling at me. Then he looked at his laptop again and this time he frowned. He looked at me and said, "You were confined to the hospital for months diagnosed of-" I covered his mouth with my hands. How could he know that information? I was shaken. Then I remembered something. He was an Ootori. They were the owners of the big hospital I was confined to. No wonder he knew that information.

"Please Kyoya-senpai. Don't tell it to anyone. I'm begging you," I told him. My tears were threatening to fall. I removed my hands from his mouth and stared at him. He nodded his head and said, "I won't tell anyone. It was a private matter anyway. And our hospital never leaks information if the patient didn't like it."

I gave him a sad smile and thanked him. He finally gave my credit card back. I went to the door, gave him a last sad look and exited the room. Akemi was waiting outside, she was back to normal.

"What took you so long?" she asked. I forced myself to give her a smile and uttered, "The card machine just malfunctioned."

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

I went home, riding the limousine my father sent to fetch me. The maids opened the door and welcomed me. They got my things from the driver and brought it upstairs, to my room. Mother went to me and hugged me.

"Are you alright?" she asked me. I nodded and said, "I didn't do anything strenuous."

"That's good," she told me. "You better go to your room now and get a rest. I would ask the maids to call you for dinner."

I nodded and obeyed. I didn't dare to tell her that I had an attack at school. She would freak out and might ask me to stop going to school. I don't like that. I like going to school and study. It makes me feel alive and healthy. I went inside the room and closed the door. I decided to take a bath and went to the bathroom. I took of my clothes and opened the faucet of my bathtub. Then I added the strawberry scented liquid soap on the water. After a few minutes, I entered it.

I feel relaxed. All of my problems seemed to wash away...my terminal illness, my imminent death and the new feeling I had when I look at those golden orbs of Kaoru-kun or is it Hikaru-kun? I hugged my knees to myself. I don't like this, it makes me want to continue hoping that someday I would be cure and healthy.

After taking a bath, I grabbed my towel and exited the bed room. I dried myself and changed into my nightdress. I slumped at the bed and felt tired all of the sudden. And after a few seconds, all I see was darkness.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

The next day, I went to the school early. I found out that the first subject was P.E. The guys cheered and the girls groaned. They hate P.E. because it was hot and they worry about what will happen to their white skin. Aside from that, the stinking sweat it would bring. Me, I also hate P.E. because I can't really play during this time. I'm excused because of my illness. I'm jealous about those people who can do whatever they want. I sighed.

When the P.E. time started, I just sat under the shade of a tree, watching those people who ran under the heat of the sun. Then the teacher announced that we will have P.E. with the 1-A students. The girls cheered. I wonder why. And after a few minutes, I understood. The twins and the one they called Haruhi, three members of the host club was in that section. The girls started to crowd into them. Akemi was nearly fainting again. I smiled, she was just so cute.

Then one of the twins stared at me. He broke away from the crowd and approached me. He sat down by my side and grinned, "Why are you sitting here by yourself? Come and play with your classmates."

"I'm excused," I told him. He pouted, "Are you sick?"

I smiled sadly and said, "Very sick." He turned me around so I could face him. He pulled his bangs upwards and put his forehead on mine.

"You don't seem to have fever," he uttered. I felt blood crept on my cheeks. I was totally blushing. I pushed him away from me.

"W-What are you doing, Kaoru-kun?" I stuttered. He smirked, "So you knew that I was Kaoru."

"It's only an instinct. But I still can't distinguish you apart," I replied. "And you're always saying that you're Kaoru-kun."

He laughed, "Because I'm really Kaoru."

I found myself looking at him in daze. He was just so beautiful. He glanced at me and caught me staring at him. I flushed and looked away.

"Just leave me alone," I said and hugged my knees, "Please, Kaoru-kun or whoever you are."

"I can't," he said. "I found myself being drawn to you since I saw you crying beside the fountain. I want to know more about you."

"No, don't," I cried, looking down on the ground. I felt his hand shot up and touched my hair, brushing some of it away from my face. My eyes widened and glanced up from the ground.

"Why are you always crying?" he asked me.

"You don't need to know," I told him. He stood up. Finally, he was going to leave me. But why does my heart ache like I don't want him to leave me alone?

"Let's go and play," a voice said above me. I looked up and saw him stretching his hand to me. He was smiling. I was in a daze again. All I could think about was how beautiful he was. His light brown hair that shines under the sun and his golden orbs that glistened as he spoke was fascinating me. Why? Why does he have this effect on me? I unconsciously accept his hand and stood up. He led me to the crowd and his twin perked up.

"Kaoru isn't that the girl we entertain yesterday?" he asked. I looked at him, "Are you Hikaru-kun?"

"Who else could I be?" Hikaru-kun rolled his eyes. The brown haired guy with him called Haruhi nudged him in the stomach. He yelped in pain.

"This unbearable guy with me was really Hikaru," Haruhi-kun smiled, "And that person with you was really Kaoru."

I saw Hikaru-kun blushed when Haruhi-kun smiled. What? Is it normal for them to blush around guys? Does Hikaru-kun like Haruhi-kun? I shook my head, how foolish of me. The teacher went to me and asked, "Is it alright for you to participate in P.E.?"

I nodded, "I won't do anything tiring and besides I'm recovering from my illness." I obviously lied but I want to participate in P.E. with everyone.

Our practical game was basketball. After teaching the basics to us, the teacher assigned us to different groups. In the guys, there were five of them in each group. The same goes for the girls too. I was in the first batch to play in the girls. I stood up and went to the basketball court. The teacher whistled and I got the ball. I dribbled it and ran to the basket, shooting it and it went in. My group cheered. The ball was with the enemy and they dribbled it to their territory. They shoot it to the basket but it missed and one of my teammates got the ball and passed it to me. I dribbled, running to our territory. I was very happy that I could play like this.

But then, my heart suddenly clenched again. I stopped dribbling the ball and my hands instantly hold my chest. I slumped down. It hurts. It really hurts. Why? Just when I started enjoying the game why did this happen? Everyone approached me, asking what's wrong with me. No, I can't let them know. I stood up and walked away, staggering.

"Don't force your own self," Kaoru grabbed my arm. "What's wrong with you? Are you hurt anywhere?"

I slapped away his hand, "D-Don't touch me." I was gasping now. It really hurts. I need to take my medicine now.

"B-But Watanabe-san," he called out desperately. Ugh, my chest really hurts. I fall down, losing consciousness already. Am I going to die? And after a few seconds, all I could see was darkness.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

anime16: I was really frustrated when I wrote this. It's because I felt sorry for Tsukino. But please do a favour for Tsukino and leave reviews.


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN. JUST THIS STORY ^^**

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

**Chapter 3: Newfound Feelings.**

I slowly opened my eyes and all I could see was white. Where am I? I could hear cries beside me. I turned my head and saw my parents at the couch on the corner, burying their heads on their hands and sobbed. I opened my mouth to speak. I want to tell them that I'm alright, that they don't need to worry because I'm alive and breathing.

"Mother," I heard my hoarse voice said. They looked up and saw me, surprise were seen on their faces. They quickly stood up. My mother went towards me and my father ran for the nurses and doctors.

"Tsukino," my mother cried. "I thought I'd lose you. I was so scared."

I raised my hand and tried to reach for her. Tears were flowing down her cheeks as she held my hand. I gave her a sad smile and said, "Don't cry. I'm still here. So, don't cry."

She closed her eyes and muttered, "Don't do that again. Promise me that you'll never do that again."

"Yes, I promise," I nodded. She wiped away her tears and grinned at me. Then the doctors and nurses came rushing. They checked me and asked what I'm feeling. I told them that I'm feeling great. They smiled and took off the oxygen masks and other devices.

"When could I be discharge?" I asked them. I don't like staying at the hospital. It reeks of medicines and aesthetics. And hospital smelled like death.

"You have to stay here for a couple of days for recovery and observation," they said and exited my room. I sighed. My parents approached me.

"Don't be sad. We brought your violin so you could play it if you're bored," my mother said. I nodded. They patted my head and exited the room too.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

A day had passed again and I smiled. Tomorrow I would be release from the hospital. I'm reading a book when I heard my door slid open. I looked up and saw a girl who had brown hair and eyes. I think I've seen her before.

"Yes, what do you need from me?" I asked her. She smiled and said, "I'm coming to visit."

"Do I know you?" I questioned her. Then I heard familiar voices coming towards my room. "Hey Haruhi, what are you doing standing at the door and not entering?" the twins said, coming out from the right side of the girl. I was shocked and couldn't even speak. They entered the room and trailing behind them was the rest of the host club.

"Do you think she would like strawberry cake?" A little boy asked, riding at the back of the emotionless guy. He just nodded. The eyeglasses guy which I recognized as Kyoya-senpai had a basket of fruits in his hands. The blonde boy was pouting, watching the twins. And the girl between the twins was holding a bouquet of flowers. After I recovered from shock, I pointed at them and asked, "What are you doing here? And who is that girl?"

"I'm Haruhi. Don't you remember?" the girl said. I looked at her and tilted my head, "Haruhi? You mean you're Haruhi-kun?" She nodded or is it he?

"Why are you wearing a dress? Are you cosplaying?" I shouted. The others chuckled and stared at me like I'm the stupidest person they've ever met.

"I'm really a girl disguised as a boy," Haruhi replied. The blonde boy wailed and hollered, "Father is really worried. I don't think it's a good idea to tell her your gender."

Haruhi glared at him and said, "I don't think of you as my father. And who is the obnoxious rich bastard who forced me to dress as a boy that I don't really like to begin with?"

The blonde boy cried at the corner and poked the floor while saying, "My daughter hates me."

I sighed, "Alright, I get it. Haruhi is a girl but why are you all here?"

"We came to visit you of course," the twins said. Then the blonde boy went towards me and flipped his hair and said, "I came to protect my daughter against the twin wolves that wanted to devour her. And of course the mother was worried too so he tagged along." The blonde boy pointed at Kyoya-senpai.

"You...You're the mother?" I asked, giggling a little. Kyoya-senpai arranged his eyeglasses and uttered, "Forced to be the mother actually. And I came here not because I'm worried of Haruhi but I wanted to meet your parents."

"Well, they're not here today," I said to him. His face fell and exclaimed, "Such a shame."

"And we don't want to be left behind so we tagged along too," the cute little boy said. I smiled as I watched them. Tears fall down my cheeks and I sobbed. I was very happy that they were here.

"Why are you crying?" the cute little boy asked. I wiped away my tears and replied, "I was just happy that you were here. Thank you everyone."

"Don't cry," the little boy pouted and gave me a box, "I'm giving you a strawberry cake so don't cry."

I nodded and accepted his gift. And the blonde boy put the basket of fruits on my bed side table. Then a warm hand patted my head. I looked up and saw one of the twins, smiling down at me. I blushed and looked away.

"Thank you too Kaoru-kun," I muttered. He looked shock and asked me, "You know that I'm Kaoru?"

I shook my head and answered, "I just have a feeling that you're Kaoru. Like I told you, I can't distinguish both of you apart."

Hikaru coughed and said, "We will just go out for a while and buy some flowers for you."

"But we already have flowers for her already," Haruhi stated. Hikaru smiled and ushered all of them out while saying, "We will buy more flowers for her."

"Wait, I'm coming too," Kaoru shouted but Hikaru stopped him from going out and uttered, "Please accompany her while we go away." Kaoru nodded his head and went back to me.

And just that, we were left alone in the room. Kaoru pulled a chair and sat down beside my bed. He looked at me and asked, "Do you want to eat apples?" I smiled and nodded. He went to get a knife and plate on the table and returned back. He reached for the apples and began peeling them. I could see on the way he peeled the apples that he doesn't know how to do it.

"Ouch," his pointed finger bled a little. I hold his hand and said, "You cut yourself."

I closed my eyes and put his bleeding finger inside my mouth. His hands shook a little and I removed my mouth on her fingers, surprised at what I've done myself. I let go of his hand.

"I'm sorry," I meekly said and reached for the apple. "I'm going to peel and cut them by myself."

He looked down and uttered, "I'm sorry. I'm not used in doing this kind of things."

"It's alright," I smiled at him. I saw him looking at me from the corner of my eyes.

"You're skilled at peeling apples," He commented. I nodded and said, "I'm always confined in the hospital since I was young so it's no wonder that I'm skilled in peeling apples."

He looked at me. "About your illness," He started but I put my finger to his lips to silence him.

"It's alright. I'm strong," I grinned at him. He took my hand that was covering his lips and said, "What about doing a surgery?"

"It's too risky. Now, I just want to live my life to the fullest. Doing things I want while I'm still alive," I replied. His hands played with my fingers, twirling and shaking it.

"B-But," I put a sliced of apple that I just finished peeling to his mouth.

"Just eat," I smiled to him. Then he felt silent, eating the apple. I stared at him and he was glancing down, a sad look on his face. I unconsciously touched his face with my hand.

"Look at me Kaoru-kun," I muttered. He glanced up.

"Don't be sad," I told him. He gave me a depressing smile and said, "It's just so sad. You're still young."

"Don't pity me Kaoru-kun. You know that I don't need that," I pulled my hand away from his face. His eyes widened and he stood up.

"It's not pity! It's...you...towards you...I...," he was lost of words. He slumped down beside my bed, clutching the bed sheets.

"I don't know this feeling. But whenever I see you I become so afraid. I'm scared of not seeing you again. That every minute, every second might be the last...that I would not be able to see your beautiful smile and expressive eyes ever again...I'm just so frustrated that I couldn't do anything for you," I could feel tears falling down in the bed sheets. I hold his trembling hand.

"You've given me so much already," I said. "I won't ask for more. Thank you Kaoru-kun."

He looked up at me and I wiped away his tears. I grinned and stood up from the bed. I reached for my violin and said, "I'm going to play for you."

I closed my eyes and I played Tan Dun's violin concerto, "The Love." After a few minutes, I stopped and asked, "How was it?" I opened my eyes and I could not see Kaoru-kun anywhere.

"Kaoru-kun," I muttered. And I felt warm arms hugged me from behind.

"You played great," He said. And my eyes blurred as tears filled them, falling down my cheeks. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his hug. Oh, why? Why am I feeling this way towards him? Why did I fall in love with him? And I know that we would never have a happily ever after. And now, I'm scared of dying, scared of leaving him when I love him this much now. Kaoru-kun, why did you let me fall in love with you? I hold his hands and smelled his relaxing scent. I love you, Kaoru-kun.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

anime16: I nearly cried while writing this one. Please review. And thanks for reading this story.


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN. JUST THIS STORY ^^**

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

**Chapter 4: Laughs and Tears.**

I was released from the hospital on the next day. The sweet moment with Kaoru-kun left me breathless, ecstatic and wanting for more. But I was confused too. Why did I fall in love with him so fast? It's just that whenever I'm with him I felt so alive, happy and comfortable. I smiled. I entered our manor and the maids greeted me. Akemi was also there to welcome me, giving me a big hug.

"I'm sorry I couldn't visit you at the hospital," she said. "But I came here to spend the night with you. I brought my school uniform so we could go to the school together."

I grinned and thanked her. My mother suggested that we should go to my room and continued our reunion there. We laughed and obeyed her. We went upstairs, opened the door to my room and went inside. We slumped on my bed, giggling and playing with each other.

"About your illness, why didn't you tell me?" she asked. She had a sad look on her face, feeling hurt and betrayed. My heart ached as I saw her like that. I reached for her and hugged her tight. "I'm so sorry. I just don't want you to get worried." She was trembling and I felt my clothes stained with her tears. I rubbed her back and whispered my apologies. After a few minutes, her crying start and she chuckled. She told me that we would be best friend forever and I smiled. Then the topic was changed and I felt myself blushing.

"So what's the score between you and one of the twins?" she smirked when she saw my flushed face. I muttered, "You mean Kaoru-kun?"

"So it's Kaoru-sama!" she wailed. I nodded and said, "The host club visited me yesterday."

"What?" she hollered. "Darn, if only my mother didn't drag me to the mall yesterday then I could visit you and see them." I smiled at her complaints.

"So what happened when the host club visited you?" she asked. My cheeks were tinted with red as I told her what happened yesterday. After telling her the story, she screamed with joy and hugged me.

"He totally likes you!" she said. I grinned. But I told myself not to raise my hopes high. I don't want to get hurt if he rejected me and he probably meant that I'm close to his heart as a friend and not romantically.

"So do you like him?" he questioned me. I blushed and nodded. And she wailed more, "You looked so cute when blushing!"

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

We went to the school early the next day. I stepped out of the limousine with Akemi and saw the twins and Haruhi-chan at the school gates, talking to each other. One of the twins saw me and waved in my direction. Akemi nudged me and I winced in pain.

"I say you wave to him, wave to him now!" she whispered to me. I forced a smile and raised my hand to wave back. He grinned to me and turned to talk to his companions. After a few minutes, he was already at my side.

"Are you Kaoru-kun or Hikaru-kun?" I asked. He rolled his eyes and replied, "Of course I'm Kaoru. You should really learn to tell as apart."

"How could I tell you apart if you looked so similar?" I told him and playfully punched his shoulders. He scowled and said, "Well I think that I'm nicer, more sensitive, soft spoken and more mature than Hikaru. And my hair was usually parted to the left side."

"You're overconfident," I mischievously smacked his head. He groaned and I giggled. Then Hikaru-kun and Haruhi-chan called to us, saying it's time to go. Kaoru-kun walked me to my classroom, trailing behind us were Hikaru-kun, Haruhi-chan and Akemi. We arrived at the 1-B's classroom and we bid farewells.

"Later," Kaoru-kun told me and walked away with his twin and Haruhi-chan. I entered the classroom but I went back and peered on his retreating form. Then he turned around and caught me staring. I flushed and looked down. Oh no, he caught me! It's so embarrassing.

"Watanabe-san," He called out. I glanced up and saw him smirking. He said, "See you later at lunch." He gave me a wave and walked away.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

When the lunch bell rang, I quickly stood up and fixed my things. I asked Akemi to have lunch together and she agreed. We went to the canteen and saw the girls crowded at a certain table. The host club was probably there. We went to get food and sat at the corner side of the canteen.

I was halfway eating when one of the twins approached me. His hair was parted to the left side. He was probably Kaoru-kun. He leaned towards me and whispered, "Let's meet after you eat lunch." I was shocked. I looked at him and saw him smirking. He went back to their table. My cheeks were hot and tinted with red. Akemi giggled beside me.

After a few minutes, I saw the blonde boy stood up and shouted, "That was mean Hikaru. How dare you steal Haruhi's packed lunch?" Hikaru-kun teased him more by hugging Haruhi-chan. The blonde boy wailed, "Don't eat my precious daughter, you Hikaru wolf!"

Then I saw Kaoru-kun stood up too and went to the door. He turned towards me and signalled me to come to him. Akemi saw this and said, "Go to him!" I nodded and went to him. He smiled and took my hand, dragging me outside.

"Where are we going?" I asked him. He chuckled and said, "I will show you something special."

He led me to a place behind the school building. It was a garden full of different types of flowers. I gasped, "I never knew that there was a place like this in the school."

"Are you happy?" he asked. I smiled at him, "Of course I am!" We went to the middle of the garden. I twirled around happily. He smiled and looked at his watch. His eyes widened and shouted, "We probably should get out of here. It's-" his words were cut when the sprinkler turned on and splashed them with water. I screamed.

"What is this?" I hollered. He sighed and replied, "It's already 12:30. The sprinklers turned on during this time."

"Why didn't you tell me? Now we're all wet," I said. He shrugged and smirked, "We are already wet. We can just play now." He slowly went towards me. I backed away, "I don't like that look on your face." He stooped down and got a sticky mud on the ground. It was probably made by the water. He ran to me and I shouted, "No! Don't come near me." He was laughing and caught me. He put his arms on my waist and swung me towards him. He put mud on my face.

"You're a jerk," I said. He let go off me and ran. I bent down and got mud on the ground. I went towards him but he ran away from me. I crouched down and kept quiet. He quickly went to me and asked, "Are you alright?" He was very concern and it made my heart flutter. But I have to take revenge. I pounced at him and pinned him on the ground.

"Revenge time," I told him and wiped mud on his face. He chuckled and tackled me. He was on the top now. We are both laughing. Then slowly our eyes met and time stood still. His deep golden orbs were staring down on me.

"Kaoru-kun," I muttered. His eyes widened, quickly get off me and mumbled, "I'm sorry."

I flushed and said, "It's alright." He stood up and offered his hand, "Let's go now." I accepted it.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

"What are you both doing?" the nurse in the infirmary scolded us. "I'm going to request for new uniforms." She reached for the telephone and dialled. Then we heard her talking about "wet" and "uniforms." We giggled and the nurse glared at us.

She banged the telephone and hollered, "Dry yourself and I have to write a note for your teachers stating the reason why both of you were late."

We resumed drying ourselves but we can't stop laughing. Then after a few minutes, the uniform came and we changed into it. We got the notes from the nurse and Kaoru-kun walked me to my classroom.

"Go to the host club later," he whispered to me before walking away. I smiled and went inside my classroom. I gave the note to the teacher and went to my chair. When I sat up, Akemi giggled and asked, "How did it go?" I told him what happened and she squealed with joy. The teacher turned towards us, "Yoshida-san and Watanabe-san, if you're more interested in talking to yourselves, do it outside please." And with that the whole class laughed.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

The afternoon classes went by in a flash and it already ended. I stood up and fixed my things. Suddenly a girl approached me and said, "I have to talk to you. Can you come with me?" I looked at her and nodded.

We exited the classroom and she led me outside of the school building. We went to a deserted place and I asked her, "What are we doing here?"

She heaved a sigh and said, "I want you to avoid Kaoru-sama." I was shocked, unable to speak. What is she talking about?

"You're dying, aren't you?" she uttered harshly. Just who is she to tell me these things? And tears fall down her cheeks. "You're just going to hurt Kaoru-sama. Don't let him fall in love with you."

"W-What are you saying?" I managed to say. More tears fall down her cheeks.

"If Kaoru-sama fell in love with you and you happened to die then he would be devastated. Do you want to take his happiness away? Do you want him to suffer? Face it girl, whoever gets involve with you then that person will get hurt. I don't want to see Kaoru-sama's sad face. So I'm begging you, please stay away from him," the girl cried. I was shaken. The girl turned his back on me, "That's all I have to say. I was hoping that you would take it to heart and stay away from him." And she walked away.

I was left all alone. What was that? I barely know her but she was telling me that I would take Kaoru-kun's happiness away. I slumped down the wall and then tears fell down my cheeks. I'm so stupid. I'm so close to him that I forgot that I'm dying. Can love really do this? I'm just so happy. I'm so happy that a tiny hope sparked on my chest, wishing that I would survive from this illness. However I'm just being stupid, right? I needed to stay away from him but would it hurt to see him one last time.

I trudged my way towards the third music room. I opened it and the roses flew everywhere. There were already many girls inside. Kyoya-senpai approached me and I said I was just going to visit Kaoru-kun. I looked to the table where the twins were entertaining their guests. One of the twins saw me and he went towards me.

"You're here," he smiled. So it was Kaoru-kun. Then he saw my puffy eyes, "Did you cry again?" I shook my head, "Dust just gets on my eyes." He tilted his head and said, "I think I heard that excuse way back." I smiled and muttered, "Go back to work."

Kyoya-senpai offered me a seat while saying, "Please tell your parents that I would be happy to meet them." I unconsciously nodded and sat down, watching Kaoru-kun. Tears suddenly cascaded down my cheeks again. I'm still watching him. Oh, I just can't leave him alone. Would someone call me selfish if I stay beside him? Is it a sin to be with him? Does fate never bounds two people who can't stay together forever? My tears overflow and I covered my mouth to prevent the sobs from escaping my lips. And then I heard him laugh. I stared at him.

"Kaoru-kun," I muttered. But at the same time, I also love his smiles and chuckles. I don't want him to stop laughing. I always want him to be happy. I don't want to see him frown or sad. I just want to keep him cheerful and in high spirits. I stood up. That was it. I have to avoid him. I ran outside and went to the fountain where we first met. I sat beside it and cried silently.

"I knew it. You were crying again," I heard his voice. That familiar soothing voice that I love. I turned around and saw Kaoru-kun panting. His hair was parted to the left and I was sure that it was really him. I stood up and went to him.

"What happened?" He asked. I smiled to him. Kaoru-kun, I love you but we can't be together. I grabbed his tie and pulled him down. I caught his lips and softly kissed it. Kaoru-kun, you've given me so much. You gave me a lot of firsts and probably a lot of lasts. Thank you. Thank you for the memories. The cries and laughs we shared together. I would probably remember it until the day I die. I broke the kiss and saw his shock face.

"I love you Kaoru-kun," I muttered and added, "...and goodbye." I ran away from him.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

I rode the limousine and went home. The maids welcomed me at the door of the manor. My mother went to me and asked, "How was school?" I hugged her tightly and cried.

"What happened?" she rubbed my back. And I let myself fall down. She joined me on the floor and hugged me back.

"Mother," I hiccupped. "Please, I want to quit school and get homeschooling courses."

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

anime16: I'm inspired of writing this one. Thanks for reading my story. Please review.


	5. Chapter 5

anime16: this story was told in Kaoru's point of view. Read and enjoy.

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN. JUST THIS STORY ^^**

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

**Chapter 5: His Side.**

My eyes widened as she grabbed my tie and pulled me to her, her lips crashing to mine. Her lips were soft and sweet. And I could feel her salty tears accompanied it. Why? Why is she crying again? Didn't she know that it hurts me to see her this way? She broke the kiss and watched me with her sad eyes.

"I love you Kaoru-kun," she told me and added, "...and _good bye_." Then she ran away from me. Why do I feel that I will never see her again? Why did her good bye seem different this time? But her sudden confession made me smile. The truth is I like her too ever since I saw her crying in the fountain. She was like a crying goddess and I felt really drawn to her. It was like love at first sight. But I was scared to tell her. She already thought that I pity her. I sighed. I'll just tell her tomorrow how I really feel.

I went back to the club room. Most of the girls were already gone. The club activities were drawing to a close. I saw Hikaru smirked when he saw me and I sat down beside him. "Why are you smirking?" I asked him. He shrugged and replied, "So how's your damsel in distress?" I rolled my eyes and said, "That's none of your business Hikaru. You should focus on confessing to Haruhi first before worrying about my problem." He blushed and I was satisfied with his reaction.

"S-Shut up," He hollered. "So what really happened to the both of you?" I leaned towards him and decided to tell him everything. He was my twin after all. I can't hide anything from him. He grinned and playfully punched my shoulders, "You scum! Congratulations! You were in the kissing stage with her already and it's only less than a week. You're a fast worker Kaoru." I flushed and I decided to ignore him.

"So you're going to answer her tomorrow then," Hikaru stated. I nodded and said, "I hope that she doesn't think that I just felt sympathy towards her condition." Hikaru smirked, "Don't worry about it too much. Just let her feel that you really like her." I grinned at Hikaru, he was really the best. He could cast away my fears and worries.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

The fateful day had come. I drew a deep breath and waited for her outside the school gates. Hikaru and Haruhi were busy talking to each other. And I'm not in the mood to get chatty with them anyway. I had my own problems to think about.

Minutes had lapsed by and she was still nowhere to be found. I was getting impatient and Hikaru and Haruhi were already nagging me to come with them to the school building. Hikaru whispered to my ear, "You have plenty of time later. Come on or we'll be late." He clutched my hand and dragged me to the school.

Before going to my classroom, I went to hers first. I peered at the door and couldn't find her anywhere. Where the heck is she? Then the girls saw me and went towards me, giggling and blushing. I gulped and ran away for my life

I reached my classroom and entered it, sitting down on my seat. I heaved a sigh. Hikaru was right, there's plenty of time later. Maybe she was running late today. Then the class bell rang and the teacher entered the classroom, starting his lesson. But my mind was not on the topic but to a certain girl, worrying if she made it to her class.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

The lunch came and she was still nowhere to be found. Her friend was even here already. What was her name again? Ayame? Asami? Or is it Asumi? I messed up my hair. Whatever her name was, I need to ask her about Watanabe. I stood up from my table, murmuring an excuse to my companions and sped off towards her friend. I tapped her shoulder and she turned around, surprised to see me. The other girls with her were wailing and giggling, telling her that she was lucky that I approached her. I rolled my eyes and looked at her friend.

"What is it?" she asked, breathless. I rubbed the back of my head and flushed, while saying, "Watanabe-san." She tilted her head in confusion. "Pardon?" she said.

"Where is Watanabe Tsukino-san?" I asked again, loud this time. She looked surprised and then recovered from it quickly. She smiled warmly and said, "You must be Kaoru-sama!" She stood up and clasped my hands. Then her smile faltered, "I'm sorry but she didn't come today at class." My eyes widened and grabbed her shoulders. "Why? What happened? Did something bad happen to her?"

"Whoa, calm down Kaoru-sama. I don't know either," she replied. "She didn't even call me that she would skip today, usually she does." I pulled away my hands off her shoulder. My hands shot up in my head and closed my eyes, shaking my head a little. She really likes to worry me to no end. I looked at her friend. I still don't know her name though and bid farewell, "Good bye and thanks for the information."

I went back to our table and Hikaru stared at me, asking for information. I told him that she didn't attend class and I was worried. He said that I leave this problem to him. I nodded. He looked at Kyoya and asked, "Kyoya-senpai, can you please tell us all the information you have on Tsukino Watanabe?" Kyoya-senpai tilted his head a little and replied, "If you can get more girls to come to our club then I might consider it." Hikaru smirked, "That was pretty easy." He stood up.

"Girls, if you come to our club later, me and Kaoru might give you something special," He waved his hands and touched his lips seductively. The girls wailed. I gulped. He's pulling me into this too. And here I thought I should just leave this matter to him alone. But if it's for Watanabe-san, I'm willing to do anything.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

Hikaru's plan was a success and girls came flooding in the third music room that I could barely breathe. And Kyoya-senpai was very satisfied as money came gushing too. Really, he's so greedy. I sighed. I hope he could just give us all the information he had without requesting for something like this. We were his friends after all.

After the club activities, we approached him. He was so pleased that he gave us a bundle of folders about her. I sighed. Just where in hell could he get so much information about a person? I looked through the folders, extracting vital information, like her address, cell phone number and even her birthday. I smiled. I would go to her house and visit her today.

"Hikaru, let's go to this address first before going home," I told him. He smirked and said, "I know you would say that." Haruhi went to us and uttered, "I'll come with you. I'm also worried about her." And when Haruhi said that, Milord and the others came too. Well, in host club, if Haruhi came, then everybody will also come. It's alright. If everybody came to visit her then the happier she would be. "Alright, we'll all go," I finally said.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

We arrived at the Watanabe's manor after a few minutes. We came out of the limousine and went to the guard standing outside. I told him that I was Watanabe's friend and would like to visit her because she didn't come to the school today. He frowned and said, "I think the young mistress quit going to school today. Today was the beginning of her homeschooling. Her teacher already went home a while ago."

"W-What are you talking about?" I managed to stammer. He looked concerned and uttered, "It was the young mistress who decided on that. I'm also quite surprised when I heard that. She loves going to school and nothing can stop her from doing so." I nodded. I know that much. A smile was always etched on her face whenever she came to the school. I asked the guard, "Can I go see her?"

"Please wait. I'll let them know," He replied. "What's your name?" I looked at him and said, "Tell her that Kaoru Hitachiin and the rest of the host club are here and we wanted to visit her." He nodded and went inside the manor.

Time had lapsed and he came back with a frown on his face. He faced us and said, "I'm sorry but the young mistress doesn't want to see all of you now." I looked at her incredulously and said, "Did you tell her that it was us?" He stared at me sadly and replied, "Yes. I told the main butler of the house about your visit. He went to the young mistress and announced it. But he came back without her and said that she refused to see all of you."

I clutched his shoulders and hollered, "But I need to ask her what's wrong." He shook his head and told us to come back some other time. No, I can't wait for some other time. I shoved him away and went to the gate. The others came to stop me. I wriggled against their grasp and exclaimed, "Let me go. I need to see her." Kyoya-senpai leaned to my ears and whispered, "Leave everything to me. Calm down." I stopped moving and looked at him with pleading eyes. He smirked and said to the guard, "We'll go home now. Please tell Watanabe-san that we'll come back. And we will _talk _to her."

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

We were already inside the limousine when I asked Kyoya-senpai his plans. He smirked and said, "You will sneak inside her room tonight." Oh, I'll just sneak inside her room. Then realization struck me.

"W-What did you say? I-Inside her room, I'll sneak in?" I stuttered. My cheeks were tinted with red. Everybody grinned and encouraged me. Milord flipped his hair and said, "Oh, young love. Just promise me that both of you won't do anything inappropriate." I turned redder. What did they think am I? A molester that will jump on her once I see her? Then I saw Hikaru's lips twitched into a smirk and said, "I doubt that they won't do something inappropriate. They already kissed once." Milord's eyes widened and hollered, "They already kissed?" Oh my god, I'm going to faint. Hikaru was so sly. He always embarrassed me.

"Shut up everyone. I'll just talk to her and I won't do anything to her," I said, turning redder every damn minute. Thanks to my ever so loyal friends.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

Why did everything turn out this way? We were chased by the guards of Watanabe's manor. It was all because we used a freaking helicopter to sneak inside the mansion, so much for sneaking in quietly like I wanted to. I was inside the helicopter and Kyoya-senpai dragged me to its door. He hollered against the noisy engine of the helicopter, "You would jump into her room." When he said that, I was like five feet above her room. He explained that I would jump down and break the glasses of her room and alas, I could finally see her again.

It was too risky, it was five feet above her room and I was not like Mori-senpai or Hani-senpai. But Kyoya-senpai's eyes twinkled and pushed me down. I screamed and waited for my fall. Then I heard the glasses shattered, seeing myself inside a dark room. A girl was sitting down on the bed. When she heard the noise, she stood up and turned around. It was Watanabe.

"Kaoru-kun," she muttered, stunned to see me in her room. I walked towards her and she backed away. "What are you doing here?" she asked. I looked at her sadly and replied, "I want to see you." She shook her head and ran to the door, opening it.

My eyes widened and I ran after her. I closed the door with my hands before she had a chance to get outside. I locked the door and she backed away from it. I walked towards her again and she was stepping backwards. Then her steps were prevented by the bed behind her. I took this as a chance and grabbed her arms. She tried to get out of my grip and she lost her balance, sending us both plummeting to the bed with me on top of her.

We both stood still, staring at each other's eyes deeply. Then she broke our contact by closing her eyes and muttered, "Just leave me alone Kaoru-kun. You will just suffer if you stay with me." I looked at her with shock and said, "What are you talking about? Why would I suffer?" She tried to push me but I held her hands and pinned it above her, slightly glaring at her.

"Answer me, damn it!" I hollered. She grimaced at me and uttered, "What if I don't want to answer any of your questions?" I scoffed at her. She was a very stubborn girl. Then an idea came to me and I smirked while saying, "Then I would just kiss you until you give in." Her eyes widened and shouted, "You wouldn't do that. You can't."

"Oh, I _would_ and I _can_," I answered her and neared my face to hers, closing the distance. When our lips were just an inch apart I stopped and asked her, "Now would you tell me what are you talking about a while ago?" She shook her head and replied, "I would not tell you and you wouldn't dare to kiss me anyway." I growled. She was being stubborn. I brushed my lips on hers and she trembled, "Stop it Kaoru-kun."

"I won't stop unless you tell me what's going on in that head of yours?" I smirked at her. She was already blushing but she still refused to talk. I sighed. Her hot breath on my face was tempting me already. And with that I finally planted a long kiss on her luscious lips, closing my eyes in the process. She tried to resist at first but eventually give in to the kiss. She wrapped her arms in my neck and kissed back. She played with my hair and I kissed her deeper. A moan escaped her lips. Then I broke the kiss, staring at her flushed face.

"So are you ready to talk now?" I asked her. She looked away and shook her head. "Then I'll just kiss you over and over until you're ready to talk," I smirked. I hold her chin and turned it towards me as I said, "You like being kissed by me, aren't you?" Then I closed the distance between us again and kissed her. I hold her in my arms and slid my hands on her back, bringing her closer to me and deepened the kiss. Her lips were so soft and sweet. We broke the kiss, panting slightly.

"Please tell me now," I begged her. "I want to know." Her eyes softened and said, "If you stayed with me, you'll just suffer because of my illness. I would just take away your happiness and your life would be miserable." Tears fall down from her cheeks. "I don't like to take away your smile. I'm dying Kaoru-kun and all I could give you were tears and pain." I was stunned. I didn't know that she worries about me a lot.

"You're stupid," I smiled at her. "You're not taking away my happiness but in fact you're giving it to me. And I would never feel miserable if you're with me. Can't you realize how much we need each other?" Her eyes widened and she suddenly hugged me tight. She snuggled closer to me and muttered, "I love you Kaoru-kun." I smiled and answered, "I felt the same way."

Then we broke the hug and looked at each other's eyes. We slowly leaned forward and closed our eyes. Then our lips melted to one another. And I tilted my head so we could kiss deeper and better. And we pulled away, panting but smiling to each other. I leaned my lips to her earlobe, biting it lightly and muttered, "Go to school tomorrow." She nodded and gave me her brightest smile. Oh, I just love seeing her smiles.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

anime16: how was it? I hope you enjoyed reading it and please leave some reviews for me.


	6. Chapter 6

anime16: this story was told in Tsukino's point of view. Read and enjoy.

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN OURAN. JUST THIS STORY ^^**

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

**Chapter 6: Doubts.**

We sat in my bed, looking at the moon through my broken windows. I leaned to him and he put his arms around my shoulder. We're in silence, but I know my feelings reached him. That I was happy for his company, that I feel relieved knowing he's near. I loved him. I fall for him so fast but what can I do? He totally swept me of my feet.

I smiled happily for the first time, a genuine smile...not the fake smiles I gave out so I could reassure my family and friends that I was alright. I snuggled closer to him and closed my eyes, silently loving his scent all over me. Then suddenly a phone rang. "That was mine," he said and picked it from his pocket. He flipped it open and said, "Hello."

"_Don't hello me, you moron! Where in hell are you? It's already 10 o'clock in the evening!"_

"Ahh, Hikaru! I'm sorry. I forgot about the time. Well, I'll meet you all in a minute," He said before hanging it up. I giggled and uttered, "You probably should go now Kaoru-kun." He grinned and nodded. Then he looked at me and took a picture. "Will you give me your cell phone number?" He asked. I nodded and gave it to him. Then I reached for my bedside table, got my cell phone and took a picture of him too. I asked for his number and he happily gave it to me.

"I'm going now," he said and stood up. It was so sudden that I felt my hands shot up and held the bottom of his shirt. He looked at me, surprised. "I—I'm going to walk you outside," I managed to stammer. He smiled and patted my head. He took my hand that was clinging to his shirt and pulled me up. "Then let's go," he muttered to me.

We exited my room, holding hands. I leaned to him for support all the way, I'm probably heavy but I don't care. I wanted to be near him. "We're here," he murmured. I looked up and saw that we're in the front gate already. We trudged our way towards the guards and they're eyes widened when they saw us.

"Young mistress!" the guards approached us, glaring at Kaoru along the way. "Are you alright?" they asked me worriedly, "Did he do anything to hurt you?" They all pointed to Kaoru-kun. I shook my head and smiled, "No! I'm alright."

I looked at Kaoru-kun and he was grinning widely. I felt my cheeks turned red. He's really adorable and handsome. "I'm going now," he said.

"Oh yeah, sorry I spaced out," I said then turned towards the guards, "Please see him off the gates." They bowed and uttered, "Yes, young mistress."

Kaoru-kun detached himself from me. He smiled and said, "Good bye. See you tomorrow." I nodded and waved at him. He was nearing the gates when he suddenly spun around and ran towards me. He rushed to me with a hug and together we fell down in the ground. "K-Kaoru-kun," I stuttered, "Why did you come back?"

He held me and I found myself kneeling in between his legs as he sat up. "I forgot something," he muttered. I smiled and said, "Is it in my room? Don't worry! I'll give it back to you tomorrow."

"No, it's something far more important," he said. "What is it—" my words were cut by his lips on mine. He gently stroked my lips and I responded back. The kiss was breathtaking. Actually, I kind of forgot to breath.

"I—I love you," He murmured. I smiled to him and replied, "I love you too." Then we stood up, with him helping me. We stared at the guards and they were gaping at us like a fish. I chuckled. He gave me a chaste kiss in the lips before disappearing in the gates. I closed my eyes and clasped my hands together.

For the first time in my life, I wanted a miracle to happen. I was hoping that I could lengthen my life and be with Kaoru-kun for as long as I live.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

I told my mother that I decided to go back to Ouran. She looked so happy. And I told her about Kaoru-kun too. She looked troubled at first then she cried. I cried along her as well. Then she told me that I should be happy and she supported us from the bottom of her heart.

Well now, I'm preparing to go to school when my cell phone rang. I picked it up and saw the caller I.D. was Kaoru-kun.

"Hello," I murmured shyly.

"_You're coming to school, right?"_

I chuckled and said, "Don't worry. I'm coming to school today."

"_I'm relieved. Then I'll see you later, ok? I'll be waiting outside the gates."_

"You don't need to," I gasped. "I don't want to bring trouble for you."

"_I insist. And besides we're going out so it's not a big deal."_

"Alright," I smiled, "Then I'll see you later."

"_Yeah, bye. Love you."_

He hung up before I could even reply. I think he's embarrassed. Oh, well, me too. I could feel my cheeks burning up right now. Kaoru-kun is really sweet.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

I saw him standing in the gates, looking so adorable and sweet. The air seemed to help him look more gorgeous that usual. I could feel that my cheeks turned red. I exited my limousine and was about to approached him when I felt someone whisper in my ears.

"_I thought I told you to stay away from Kaoru-sama because you're just going to hurt him."_

I looked up and turned around. I saw several students, walking casually. "Tsukino!" I heard Kaoru-kun shouting my name. I froze. He called me by my first name. I was completely caught off guard.

"You call me by my first name!" I shouted when I turned around to meet him. I think my face is redder than tomato now.

"Of course," he smiled, "We're going out after all." I smiled at him then I remembered the words I heard a while ago. I'm just going to hurt him if I stayed close. But still, it wouldn't hurt if I became selfish just a little bit, right? I don't want to be apart from him.

"Let's go," he said, holding my hands and dragging me inside the school. For now, this should be alright. Staying beside him and doing things together happily.

_**Afraid to Let You Go**_

**anime16: **after not updating for so long, I hoped you like this comeback chapter. Please review and let me know what you think. And look forward for more chapters from this story._**  
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